For someone that watched their home being ravaged by divorce, I really never had faith in the design of marriage, my childhood memories are filled with women in my life that were battered by the institution. I knew that marriage was not for me and my constant prayer to God every night was to finish my Bachelor’s degree and work on my career, If there was one thing I was certain of was my career when it came to my future.It was evident that I carried my childhood hurt and I would throw myself in relationships that would pile more on my baggage (I was literally the bag lady Erykah Badu was singing about).Eventually one relationship left me so broken I gave myself to Christ , I couldn’t do it on my own anymore , the heartbreak needed divine healing.
Right after my salvation, a friend of mine that understood my outlook on marriage, sat me down one random day while we were making preparations for her wedding and asked me whether I had started praying for a husband, I was puzzled by her suggestion because I shared my sentiments with her, but in her defence “Tiffy you cannot be a Christian and not get married, eventually your strong-will will crumble and lead you into a life of sin”, she continued to ask me to pursue this matter in prayer. The prayer was about God healing my childhood and restoring in me the concept of marriage, being specific of the husband I want and to give God a year (Some sort of a deadline) haii what a dispiriting task for someone who has been anti marriage all her life . I continued to choose the age 28 I believed 4 years was enough for the process of healing as I was 24 at that time(I was wrong, still in the healing process even at this moment typing this)….at the end of that prayer I remember adding “God may your will be done with my life, if it’s your will that I get married then so be it.”

My preference for a tall partner was reinstated time and again in my prayers, later I came across an article of a local rugby player and I said to God boldly that’s what I want for a husband, a giant that would complement me, truth be told I wanted the rugby player but hey I will accept any giant thrown my way. I always laugh when I look back at my boldness in this prayers especially I was not emotionally invested in them but I guess part of me wanted to make everything hard for God just so I can have an excuse of why I never really got around to getting married but I have soon come to be in realisation that nothing is really impossible with God, I mean he would have thrown the actual rugby player to me for ambiance maar I am still not complaining, like have you seen my husband?

Time flew and the idea of marriage became favourable to me, the daunting idea of marriage was infiltrated by a flick of hope every time I prayed. Slowly but surely I believed in the age 28, and I didn’t see myself single beyond that age, my friends would often jokingly laugh at the idea of getting married at the age of 28 without a boyfriend and I would tell them that my husband and I won’t date for long, we will get married in a year of meeting one another and the more I said it, the more I believed it and soon set off as my song all the time.
December 2016, while helping my other friend with her wedding (Also love to add that I was a bridesmaids/maid of honour 6 times) I felt some way, I still cannot explain the feeling and immediately told her that I feel like I am going to get married soon we both laughed it off and concluded the feeling surfaced because of the wedding preparations that were happening. The feeling kept on bugging me and I eventually went to CNA and bought a wedding magazine just to quench the feeling. I felt so stupid, I blame it on the Holy Spirit because that was plain crazy but that’s how faith works right?

Later on the month my friend asked me that I visit her for a birthday weekend in Thaba Nchu and there’s a guy she would like me to meet, well I was familiar with being hooked up all the time by my friends, why though?…was I boring? LOL .Immediately after I dropped the call, I got a friend request from my now hubby and an inbox and I decided to ignore him. Keep him sweating. ..Yes he is hot but I mean who does he think he is? In his defence he saw my pictures from my friend’s wedding and he asked about me, that’s when the friends had a light bulb moment. The Friday of the birthday weekend I was broke ,like I had nothing to my name and my hair was a mess and I decided that I am not going.My little sister practically begged me to go, she kept on saying this is your husband sis but why did everyone want me married?She chose my outfit and did my hair and by the time I left the house, my friend called to tell me they are at the border, my hubby proposed they should pick me up at the border.Hello?Still a gentleman that one.

The first time I laid eyes on him, I knew he was my husband.(I said oh my thrrss my dream, ok maybe i sound cheesy BUT still) OH my word he was so tall and his hug engulfed me..and guess what he did play rugby at some point in his life .I am a giant but it was the first time I got a hug from a man and I felt him all around me. I immediately felt safe. We continued in our conversation that’s when he told me I am his wife and asked me to set a wedding date, I chose February 2018, a year later. A girl with a plan I am telling you. The following morning we hiked Thaba Nchu, Tiffy was fully glammed up with lip-gloss without any anticipation whatsoever on what was about to go down, hiking a steep mountain for 6 hours. I hated that date, horrible date, I was sun burned and kept on falling on my bum the whole entire time, he held my hand and would keep reassuring me to follow his lead and walk in his footsteps, there was a time I wished I had a stick to lean on and he broke a shrub for me, or a time a group of us were stuck and he left to go find us a way and right there on that mountain that’s where I knew he is my husband, the leadership role he took upon himself screamed marry me now.
A month later he introduced me to his parents, I was reluctant at first but he assured me that it was necessary for his parents to know me, I was freaked out but I didn’t anticipate what I was about to find out. While the mom and I were conversing we found out that her and my mom were roommates/friends in nursing college and it all came back to me, I remembered that at a ladies conference at church one pastor said the dots will connect, our moms were reunited after all this years and it was just a crazy coincidence, my husband proposed 3 months after the Thaba Nchu hike, we married a year later 1 April 2018 and I was 28 years old….But God?!Everything I had asked him in a prayer 4 years ago fully came to pass.Honestly theres alot of things I included in that prayer i made in 2014, like our sex life lol I knew my pre marital sex experience might affect my marriage so I had to put it in there for control, Ok?
JoyceMeyer often jokes about her marriage with Dave, that if Dave never married her as quick as he did they would never be married. I agree with her sentiments and I will talk about those reasons in the next episodes to come.The first year of marriage was flames LOL I look back always and I always see what God has done for me, a little girl that never believed in marriage, married her dream guy exactly a year after they met, at the age of 28 and our moms being friends was a cherry on top. We really serve a faithful God, a God of yes and amen, A God that fulfils his promises. I love being married to him .Marriage has its challenges but it’s in this coincidences that always reinforces my faith in God whenever I stumble, he didn’t lead me this far to leave me. My restored faith in the ministry of marriage has been planted in my spirit. I pray that God uses this blog to help me illuminate and enlighten people that have lost faith in marriage and restore and mend broken marriages. Not my will but Gods will be done in my blog journey

What do you believe God for? Write it down and be specific and let’s pray with you.
Please remember to subscribe to the blog, like BoldTiffy Facebook page and Thank you for taking time to read. The next episode I will be about my first year of marriage. How hard it was for me.🌸

20 Responses

  1. You write so well I have so much I would want to share but don’t have the gift of writing..

    Super proud of you, always a lovely read, keep it up

    1. Thank you Katia, trust me I never knew I had it in me until I started but if there’s one thing I knew was that I had to start, just start sis 💜

  2. This is beautiful, knowing you both, I always smile when I see your posts cz you’re really perfect for each other.

  3. The sweetest read from you.
    The sweetest people of your age
    The loveable people close to my heart.
    Ice in the cake, how you wrote your story.
    God is the POWER🙏

  4. I don’t know why I have always postponed to get on to your stories. But I am so glad to be here. Really inspiring stories Tiffy & yes God always has a way to show and give us what we ask from him…from our lips to his ears….

    Keep writing and guiding sis xoxo

    1. Now this is a beautiful read, so proud of you flatmate ❤… A book very soon right?

      1. Hahaha a book ohhh no I haven’t thought that far..But Thank you for the compliment flatmate…..and Thank you for taking time to read the blog 💕

  5. What you believe in God will Grand it to you. This is so inspirational Tiffy. Thanks for sharing it brings Hope.

  6. Thank you so much for trusting us with your truths and sharing them so boldly. It’s really inspirational. You’ve definitely given me perspective on a lot of things.. I feel like all these blogs should ultimately be made into a book. I’d definitely love to have a copy of bold Tiffy as a manual of some sort.. something I can keep referring to now and then . Keep writing baeb.. it heals some of us♥️

    1. You have always believed in me, Thank for your support and encouragement always…hmmm a book , I have not thought that far yet but it’s worth considering at some point. I am always happy to know that impacting even one person with my truths .Thank you 🌸

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